Monday, September 24, 2007

Pity Party for Owen Wilson postponed

Imagine you are Owen Wilson- you are getting platefuls of hot, young Hollywood pussy, picking up million dollar paychecks for essentially playing yourself in films and you decide to kill yourself? WTF?

Holy shit! Is this guy crazy or what? If I had that nose and lived that life I would be bounding out of bed thanking Jesus every morning, taking care not to wake the 18 year old twin models I brought home last night and who's names elude me.

Anyway, guy needs a reality check. There are people actually suffering out there - in Africa and Iraq. People survived Nazi Germany without slitting their rists... and yet this guy can't handle his empty swingers lifestyle in Santa Monica.

Fuck you, Owen!

Friday, August 03, 2007

Camelback HS has a bad memory - and that's ok

Camelback High School kicked me out in 1987. It was bullshit. Even with twenty years to ruminate over such events things are still clear on the subject. All is forgiven though!

The whole process was motivating, and I've shown people who are not watching and haven't tuned in for 20 years that I can make it. I was absent a few times too many- so what? I got over it, they should too... ( I kid )

The nice folks who put on the 20 Year Reunion don't know about all that. I am glad to be on board. I recently hopped in the Way Back Machine and checked out the old Yearbook. What a wonderful way to remember the Middle Period 1980's. I love all your haircuts, the charming smirks, glorious females forms and those wonderful, hopeful expressions of promise for the future.

Fuck CBHS administration from 20 years ago if they can't take a joke! If it makes you feel any better, I was indeed up to no good: I was drinking and I was getting laid and I was 420 friendly. But I was a good student and I still have a CBHS Perfect Attendance notice from a time shortly before the party train rolled in- so let's kiss and make-up?

Spartans, Spartans - OOOOhh AAHHHHH!

Make mine a Maker's Mark Manhattan- up.

I toast you from San Francisco. Live from my house


Sunday, August 27, 2006

Burning Man is dumb

It's the time of the year again, folks. Yes, that's right, Burning Man is upon us.

Burning Man- The annual pilgrimage to the Nevada desert by white, middle/ upper-class people who get to pretend they're all fascinating and unique snowflakes for two weeks. A celebration of the World!

Right, like I wanted to see all the washed up dot.commers again, playing hippy art student in the desert!

The Burning Man poseurs are part an "in" crowd who pretend to reject such conventions, but then again- they all look, sound and act exactly the same. And god-damn do they get indignant when you call them out on it! "You don't get it man, you're not living till you live on the Playa"- yea, and run around naked, cover myself in paint, wear a silly outfit and make-out with 15 strangers.

Know what? the majority of people in Africa live in the dirt every day. Our ancestors did it for hundreds of thousands of years- there's nothing ground-breaking about it. You want to get personal with the elements of nature? Go camping with a bottle of Jack Daniel's and a bag of weed- shut up for once and really experience something.

It all Sounds wonderful of course. Living in the dirt, getting fucked up on drugs, waking up with whatever happens to roll on top of you that night -and perhaps give you a disease. Then you go from camp to camp checking out other's people's retard art, telling them they're geniuses, hoping wildly they'll return the favor when they see you locked out of your head on booze and pills.

It's like a "free pass" to act like an idiot in the hot sun. Then you just write off the indiscretions as Burning Man Fun that nobody could understand because it was altered State affair, man. Then smile idiotically, for next year you can rejoin all your noise-aholic friends again!

So long, suckers!

Tuesday, April 25, 2006

Oil Companies to America, SCREW YOU!

Can you feel the love the from the oil companies?

First the mark-up on Spot oil prices at Future Markets and now theft at the pump on top of $3 + gas prices!

Is pump giving you what you pay for ?

Complaints climb with gas prices as some fail to deliver as promised
By Enric Volante
Tucson, Arizona | Published: 04.23.2006

You get less than you pay for at hundreds of faulty gas station pumps in Arizona.
Motorists are complaining more about being shorted as rising gas prices make them watch the meter more closely.
"Right now I am being inundated with fuel-device complaints," said Shawn Marquez, who supervises inspections by the Arizona Department of Weights and Measures.
The department is normally hard-pressed to stay on top of gas pumps that don't measure up. With two months still to go in the fiscal year, it has received about 2,300 complaints from motorists, up from 1,800 for all last year, officials said Friday. To keep up, the state is bringing on three more inspectors.
With gas in Tucson averaging $2.81 a gallon for regular unleaded on Friday, consumers "had better be watching" when they fill up, motorist Wendy Palmer said.
The social-services case manager said she was fueling her Ford Taurus in October at TMC Shell, 5470 E. Grant Road, when the meter suddenly jumped ahead. "There was no way that much gas went in it that fast," she said.
She complained to the station, then to the state. A state inspector found that pump was OK, but three others were not dispensing enough gas. Records show the station was fined $900 and fixed the devices.
A service station owner who paid Tucson's largest fine in the past year said he and others do their best to comply with state rules, but that they're unreasonably stringent — particularly when it comes to meter "jump."
Even a well-maintained pump will build up pressure and jump a bit, yet regulators show zero tolerance, fining owners $300 for harmless jumps of a penny or less, said Tom Cooley, whose C and T Oil Co. with four stations was fined $2,700 after inspectors faulted fuel-labeling at his station at 1701 N. Alvernon Way.
He was unaware the state had changed the labeling rules and has fixed everything, he said.
"Everybody is upset about this except Weights and Measures, because it's a moneymaker for them," Cooley said.
Regulators, though, say fines go to the state's general fund, not their department. They say overcharges may be small for each consumer, but the cumulative effect is significant.
"If you're selling a couple of thousand gallons a week, a penny (overcharge) on a gallon of gas becomes real money pretty fast," Weights and Measures spokesman Steve Meissner said.
700 gas pumps flunked
Since the start of last year, regulators have flunked close to 700 gas pumps, meters and nozzles, including at least 89 in Tucson, for dispensing less gas that customers paid for, an Arizona Daily Star examination of inspection data shows.
That's a fraction of the state's pumps and there's no evidence the shortages are intentional: Investigators attribute pumps that don't dispense the right amount to inadequate maintenance.
Weights and Measures allows most pumps for cars to be about one shot-glass short on 5 gallons. Any more and the pump gets tagged and shut until fixed. Station owners may be fined up to $5,000 per violation, although fines are sometimes reduced or canceled, usually in exchange for an agreement to do regular maintenance.
Stations also get cited for failing to update prices on street signs, unreadable labels on fuel and other problems. Pumps that deliver too much gas, favoring the customer, may remain in use if fixed within 30 days.
Citations down from 2003
The number of citations is down from 2003, but how much of that is due to better compliance is unclear because Weights and Measures cut back on gas inspections as it focused on other priorities.
The department's inspection staff, which also monitors supermarket scanners and many other devices, was cut in half in the early 1990s after the auditor general said the state could save money by not doing yearly inspections.
Although the department still does regularly scheduled inspections, it's hard-pressed to check fuel devices more than once every three years.
It relies on complaints from people like Tucsonan Nick Cialdella, a home developer who said he complained to the state last year after a pump's meter showed it dispensed about two gallons more than the capacity of his Ford Expedition's gas tank.
Regulators found the dispenser at Ranas Union station, 7095 E. 22nd St., skimped on all three grades of fuel. They levied a fine of $900 and the station fixed it, records show.
In response to the twin surges in complaints and in gas prices, the department plans to add three inspectors to its current 16 1/2 full-time posts.
"Since we can't do anything about the price," Assistant Director Dennis Ehrhart said, "at least we can do everything we can to make sure the consumer is getting a gallon when they buy a gallon."

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